My Awesomely Random Life (and Everything in Between)

Posts tagged ‘The Office’

JOB-ba the Hut

MICHAEL-SCOTT-THE-OFFICE

Being a librarian has its perks, y’all. Working with books every day, getting people excited about becoming forever learners, thinkers and doers, working with books every day, making a difference in the lives of your students/patrons, working with books every day, the opportunity to work with some amazing people, and of course, getting to work with books every. damned. day. That being said however, it does have its drawbacks. A few which include tight budget constraints, strict funding and job security.

The former has made my heart so incredibly full, my life mucho happy. The latter on the other hand have made me something of an expert on the field of staring unemployment in the face like it’s the Reaping, and I, as Katniss Everdeen, have to somehow survive almost sudden death in the Arena of the Crappy Economy and No Jobs. While I’ve always been fortunate enough to find another job, it never becomes any more fun to embark on the risky endeavor of networking your ass off until you find something, anything, to help pay the bills. And not only that, but find a job that makes your heart smile, a job that you’re good at, a job that you’re excited to wake up in the early AMs every morning and go to. But first, before you ride into battle, you have to prepare for war.

The following is a list of suggested activities in which one can partake so that the first 24-48 hours (or in my case, three weeks) of impending unemployment don’t feel as unproductive as a “Holy chocolate-covered potato chips, Batman! I’M UNEMPLOYED?!?!” pity party.

  1. Mentally plan for the worst case scenarios first. How much could you make by selling your Brewers collector bobbleheads on Ebay? What if you sublet your bedroom and just slept on your own couch? Would your parents agree to “bankroll your groovy lifestyle” and therefore be awesome in your eyes even though, let’s face it, they probably want you moving back home with them as much as you want to move back home with them?
  2. Stare into the fridge as if you will never see it this full ever again. Good bye, six dollar bag of organic Kale salad greens potato chips from Whole Foods. It was nice knowing you, leftover Magnolia cupcake from that one time you decided to show moderation and only have half a cupcake. Soon, take-out containers and greasy bags of drunken pizza cravings will be a thing of the past because you are Unemployed and thus cannot afford to eat more than canned chicken-noodle soup with a side of misery.
  3. Eat other half of the Magnolia cupcake. Decide if you’re going to be poor, you’d better get as many calories in you now before you have to revert to living off of your own body mass. Debate going to get another cupcake, because one half really is never satisfying, like ever.
  4. Call your parents and let them know you’re out of a job because hey, it’ll make them feel appreciated and wanted and if you do have to beg them to pay for everything, at least this will give them prior notice. They, in turn, will console their baby — because you are still their baby, after all — and while you, blubbering and telling them that you’re “Trying To Make It Work!” and “You’ve got Prospects!” and “Ideas!” as to where to find a new job, might actually feel a sense of comfort you haven’t had since your favorite blankie was finally donated to the rag heap in the sky.
  5. Have pity party anyway. Dance around to some Hall and Oates and rock the ish out of said pity party. Invite some friends. And tequila. Just all of the tequila.
  6. Reconnect with anyone you might have ever known who could help you get a job. Become one of Those People who asks how somebody is only to follow it up with a “SO THIS IS WHAT YOU CAN DO FOR ME!” kind of remark. Don’t they want good karma? Won’t helping you find a job make them feel like a good person? Also, you should size up everyone on the street as to whether they work at a company that might employ you, or could possibly employ you themselves. Debate striking up conversation, because it’ll show you’re gutsy and outgoing and a go-getter! (Isn’t that what companies want from their employees, anyhow?)
  7. Update about it on Facebook and Twitter, because this is Reality and when you’ve got a cushy job with severance and slash or tenure 15 years later, you’d like to scroll down your timeline and remember those quaint days when you weren’t sure how you were going to make rent or pay your Spotify bill. Also, go through Twitter and rabidly delete any content a future employer might find unsatisfactory. Yes, even that 140-character rant you crafted on last Tuesday morning’s commute about how that bacon and egg sandwich from the street cart is going to eff you up so good.
  8. Break down your monthly expenses on a microscopic scale. Budget $40 a week for food, if you really make an effort to cook everything — and by “cook,” I mean, make half a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for each meal. Call up your cell phone provider and explain that because you’re losing your job, you need a discount or even a free month of unlimited service because how else are you supposed to find a job (or play Words with Friends in your first few days of unemployment and doing less than nothing) if you can’t put a phone number on the top of your resume?
  9. Rationalize that you’ve worked really hard for a long time, so maybe a few weeks to yourself will be a good thing. You can mentally decompress. You can go to the gym you’re too busy to use, and you’ll impress your interviewers with a newly chiseled physique, wrought from the combination of making the gym your new place of pro bono employment and following the Too Broke To Really Eat diet plan.
  10. Watch too much television with characters that have jobs they constantly bungle, and wish life were that glossy. Because it’s not. Instead, you gloss up your resume a little, make sure your one blazer is lint-free, and take your risks with LinkedIn even though those emails reminding you to add Tommy with whom you worked on one project in Ethics class back in college to your contacts have driven you batty ever since you both graduated. And then you buy a cupcake. Because if you’re going to hoof it all over and be friendly and polite during your interviews, it’s probably a good idea to avoid being hangry while doing so.

These are all great tips to employ (pun intended) in your current state of pending joblessness, but probably the most important thing you can do during this suckier than a vacuum time my friends, is to never, ever never ever give up. Ever. If there’s one thing I’ve learned during my time in the Arena, it’s that it’s okay to get frustrated, it’s okay to be scared and nervous, but you can’t lose that hope. You can’t take rejection as an end-all, be-all. Learn from every application, every interview, every time you came so close but weren’t close enough and use that as motivation. You’ve got this. You’ve totally and 110.9999784% got this.

And always, always eat the full cupcake.

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The Un-Busy Bee

I like to tell myself I’m a busy-bee. I write “watch The Office” on my calendar (because that is obligatory), get stressed about trying to find a part-time job, keeping the house (somewhat) clean and fuss over trying to manage time to go to the grocery store AND Target all in one day. Oofta! I’ve mentioned before that I have a problem with feeling like I have to always be productive; I feel lazy and almost guilty if I am not constantly doing something ‘good’ with my time. I have never really felt like I could take some time just for me, to step back from the hustle and bustle of things for just a minute and just be(e).

You see, my wicked ‘roommate’ ED always had something on my ‘to-do’ list. In some ways, I think I always felt more comfortable always doing-doing and going-going because when I was, I didn’t have time to think about ED. I could focus on other things and if just for the brief hour of apartment cleaning or two hours of studying, I could put her on mute and not think about how tight my jeans felt that day or if I ate too much Captain Crunch that morning. Recently, I’ve become sick of trying to think of things that I have to do. I have found that I don’t have to be always on the go, 24/7 and that it is perfectly okay to spend a little time doing nothing. I have also found that I don’t need to be doing these things in order to put ED on mute; I can just do it. She must have come down with a bad case of  laryngitis because for the past few weeks, I haven’t heard her constant demands and controlling and manipulative attitude. I am learning how to block her out and go by what I want to do, what I need to do. And can I tell you, it has been amazing!

I’m currently in a bit of a limbo. I have yet to start graduate school (September can’t come fast enough) and I am still pulling hairs trying to find a part-time job which leaves me with a lot of open and free time. My planner hasn’t been this empty since, well, I can’t even remember. I used to have that 9-5 “Big Girl” job, waking up with the sun (and sometimes even before it) and working all day. I really loved what I did and I took comfort in having a set purpose to every day, but it seemed like I never had any free time. I didn’t get months off from my responsibilities. This time last year, I would have done anything for not only a Klondike bar, but also to have any time to be unproductive which is one of the reasons why I have decided to take full advantage of this situation and appreciate it while I can!

Today I saw an opportunity to do absolutely nothing…and pounced on it.

I took a drive to nowhere.

I stopped and smelled the roses, really appreciating my surroundings.

It’s amazing how much you miss when you are not looking, not taking it all in. My little town of Cartersville really does have a lot of character and before now, I am not quite sure if I ever really saw how unique and special it was. I was always too busy, too preoccupied.

I even took some time to put on my chef’s hat and kind of whip up an amazing lunch.

I wok it out, I wok it out 🙂

 

I sautéed some pineapple, carrots, peppers, broccoli, chicken, and a little EVOO and threw it over brown rice. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but it was awesome! I think I am really starting to get a hang of this cooking thang. I can’t tell you how fun it has been trying new things and allowing myself to for once enjoy cooking AND eating again. Take that, ED!

Overall, this day in the life of a reformed busy-bee has been great! I don’t think I can ‘bee’ this unproductive everyday, but I can assure you I am scheduling in an ‘off’ day on my calendar at least once a week, right beside ‘watch the Office’.

Hope you all are having a great Wednesday!

Question of the day:

Do you feel the need to always be busy?

What do you like to do with your free time?

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