10 Things You Won’t Ever Hear a Book Nerd Say

10 Things You Won’t Ever Hear a Book Nerd Say

1. “I don’t know what I want for Christmas/birthday/insert random holiday here.”

Because obviously the answer is books. Books, books, and more books. Or at least some sweet gift cards to a bookstore.

2. “I really thought the movie was better than the book.”

This isn’t a thing that happens. Ever. And it does, I will personally bake and send you some of my world famous (I’ve got lots of references, mostly me) chocolate-chip cookies.

3. “Ugh. I’m so bored. There’s like, nothing to do.”

There really is no such thing as boredom when you’re a book nerd because every good book nerd knows to take a book with them wherever they go. At any one time I’ve got at least one five in my purse (who needs crossfit when you’re lugging around hard covers all day?), in my car, and of course in every room of my apartment.

4. “I just really don’t like to read.”

This isn’t an actual thing people say, right? WHO ARE THESE MADMEN?!

5. “Nope, I don’t have any plans this weekend.”

The plan is there is no plan. Weekends are for reading all of the things.

6. “Nah, I don’t need to go into that bookstore. I already have enough books.”

Ha! Hahahahahahahahahaha!

7. “I don’t have anything to read.”

HA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

8. “I think I’m going to call it a night and just go to sleep. That next chapter can wait until tomorrow.”

If you think I am going to be able to sleep without finding out what happens next, you’re absolutely bonkers. Bonkers, I tell you! There is always time to read one more chapter.

9. “We should totally build a snowfort!”

Everyone knows that booksforts > snowforts.

10. “Oh you are too sweet but I don’t think I’ll need help moving.”

Of course I need help moving. Who’s going to help me carry all these giant boxes of books!?