I’m not sure if you have seen this yet–and please, if any of you are struggling with an eating disorder and are not in a good place, do not read the article because it is very triggering–but an article with the disgusting headline “5 Reasons To Date a Girl With an Eating Disorder” has recently sent shock waves of social media outrage. And for good reason.
“Nothing screams white-girl problems louder than a good old-fashioned eating disorder,” starts the blog post, written by an author using the pseudonym “Tuthmosis.” An author who had the nerve and the audacity to make light of something so serious, so real, so unfunny, yet didn’t have the balls to use his real name on this horrific, cynical, and terribly cruel article should say something to you right there. The post goes on to list a compendium of so-called reasons why a woman struggling with an eating disorder could be seen as a preferred mate.
I will admit, I struggled reading this article.
As my eyes poured over the foul words that this “Tuthmosis” wrote, I felt my anger rising to insurmountable levels. How could someone even think that something like this was funny?! The complete naivety and insensitivity that this man had, has, was and is daunting.
I thank God everyday, every second of every minute of every hour that I was able to kick my eating disorder to the curb. I did not like the person I was back then; hidden behind the mask of ED, I was afraid, scared, weak, and vulnerable. I was unhappy, unmotivated, and was constantly worrying about what others thought about me. It hindered my health, my career, and my relationships. If I didn’t like myself, love myself, how could anyone else?
This author at least on the surface appears to be devoid of any context of eating disorders and the mentality surrounding them. From that standpoint, the intent of the original post author, a troll looking for traffic or legitimate moron, is irrelevant. Whether the outrage drives traffic to the site is irrelevant. The reality is that there are people in fragile stages of recovery and because of that they, can be negatively affected by the content. It is important for those people that there are others who will speak out and show them support, even if its only in comments and even if it drives traffic to a horrible site.
Even the most vile material in the world can bring out the best of those willing to step into fray and show compassion for others going through difficult times. Maybe I am wrong, but I suspect this author does not have any context on that level to see the forest through the trees.
What I would really like to see happen is Mr. “Tuthmosis” apologize for his post. I would like for him to be formally educated in what an ED is. I would like for him to see how hurtful his words were, how powerful they could be. I would like for him to realize he was wrong on SOOOOOO many levels.
And while I know this probably won’t be happening anytime soon, I would hope that call of attention that he has called upon himself sparks a discussion, an outpouring of support and help for those who are battling their EDs, fighting everyday to take off that mask and reclaim their lives.
Shame on you, “Tuthmosis”.
The irony is that I can think of 100,000,000 reasons to NOT date a naive, insensitive, cruel and heartless jerk like you.
If any of you are struggling or know someone who is struggling with an eating disorder, please know that you are not alone; there are people and organizations right by your side, ready and willing to help you get through this. Please check out the National Eating Disorder Association for more information.
And please feel free to message me at anytime.
We may not be able to kick this author’s ass, but together we can kick ED’s ass!